Thank you, all of you, for being so kind. I read your comments, and cried on my husband's shoulder, got myself together, and then my mom called and I lost it with her as well.
The vet said that Siggy is stressed and tense from the effort of staying alive. She's probably not in overt pain, but she's certainly not comfortable and she's not treatable. The vet said. "Any time now is the right time."
I hadn't considered having El C there (I was planning to tell him, but then take her by myself to have her put down) until Christine suggested it. I asked our vet about it, and she said that kids seem to be able to deal with it better than adults do. Given how well El C regulated what he wanted to see and didn't want to see while El P was being born, I decided to let him come along and watch the sedative injection. Then see how he's doing and have him go into the waiting room to wait with El Grande for the other shot. I asked him if he wanted to come and watch us "help her die" (thanks for the language, Alison) and he said he did. Then he said, "I want to give you two things" and gave me a hug and a kiss. What a love he is.
Poor sweet little Siggy.
oh :( I'm sorry. Sniff...
Posted by: Linda B | June 12, 2006 at 11:26 AM
I am so sorry--I lost my sweet 18 year old cat six years ago and I still miss her. I do think you're doing the right thing. I let my kitty go on too long because I couldn't bear to make the decision. And El Chico is a darling, what an empathic little boy.
Posted by: AmyinMotown | June 12, 2006 at 11:35 AM
So sorry about Siggy...this is the 4th pet I've heard about having to be put to sleep in only a few weeks!
Your sweet kid is wonderful...what a kind little guy.
I'm thinking of you and your family...losing a pet is horrible.
Posted by: Sarah | June 12, 2006 at 11:36 AM
I'm sorry. I'll be praying for comfort for your family today.
Posted by: Julie | June 12, 2006 at 11:48 AM
Isn't it amazing how important pets are? I have a special cat too, and she is truly a family member... but I still remember with fondness the cats who are now gone but were once an intregal part of my life. I'm so sorry. Take care of yourself.
Posted by: Shelley | June 12, 2006 at 12:09 PM
so sorry for your loss... I was too chicken to take our dog in a year ago, I said goodbye to him at home and then my husband took him; I think I would've been too selfish and tried to keep him alive despite how sick he was. I cried for a week. I keep his tags in my jewelry box and still get little twinge in my heart when I see them.
I'm impressed with your son's coping skills. And how sweet of him to *know* you needed that emotional support! I hope you can all find a way to remember & mourn her that feels right and helps you heal from her absence.
Posted by: honey | June 12, 2006 at 12:13 PM
Poor kitty. But lucky kitty, to have such a loving home. And YOUR son is so sweet it makes me cry.
Posted by: Ally | June 12, 2006 at 12:23 PM
I am so sorry about your kitty. We adopted three cats with feline leukemia over a course of a few years and had to put each of them to sleep when the disease took over. It is the hardest thing. Only with one of them did we wait a bit because we didn't want to let her go, and I still feel bad about that.
I kind of pretend/believe that our pets come back to us again later in life. Makes me feel better about letting them go now.
I think it is great that you are bringing El C. Even though he is young, I remember my pets deaths when I was a kid and I think it was helpful to me to be a part of it.
Posted by: Heather | June 12, 2006 at 12:26 PM
This sounds like a good idea. I was 6 or 7 when one of our cats suddenly came down with stomach cancer, and was put down. One morning she was acting funny and having trouble walking, then when I came home from school she was gone. My dad said he'd taken her to the vet and the vet had put her to sleep. I understood what it meant, and that she shouldn't have had to suffer, but the suddeness of Bubble being gone was difficult.
Poor old Siggy is lucky to have a great family to care about her happiness.
Posted by: Rosemary Grace | June 12, 2006 at 12:56 PM
Oh Moxie. This was a horrible trip to the vet. I'm so sorry. I've only had to go once in my life to see this and it was heartbreaking. It was my Newfoundland and I just got on the floor and held her and held her. I think you are a great mama-- to kids, to cats, to any of us here who need it-- All my love to you today.
Posted by: Katie/WannaBeMom | June 12, 2006 at 01:00 PM
So sorry for your loss :-(
I am glad that El Chico got to say goodbye--my brother (age 12 at the time) insisted on being with our dog (then 16 1/2) when she was put to sleep. My mom was a mess over her, so it was my brother who held her close as she died.
Kids can really be amazing.
Posted by: Kate | June 12, 2006 at 01:14 PM
I'm so sorry, Moxie, it is so hard to be put in this position. Poor, poor Siggy. But it sounds like you're making the very best decision for her.
I have to say also, I am so blown away by your empathetic and sweet little boy. You've done well.
Kirsten
Posted by: iheartnewyork | June 12, 2006 at 01:15 PM
I'm so sorry, Moxie. Poor kitty, poor you. At least you have reassurance that you are doing the right thing, that you are caring for her even when it's hard for you.
El C is a strong, empathetic boy.
Posted by: Bethany | June 12, 2006 at 01:20 PM
I'm so so sorry. I have been there. The worst part is that most people don't understand and sympathize. Thank god for the internet. :)
I'm glad she's at peace now. Take some time for yourself.
Posted by: Lena | June 12, 2006 at 01:34 PM
Also, your son? Could I heart him more?
Posted by: Lena | June 12, 2006 at 01:35 PM
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Posted by: jen | June 12, 2006 at 01:37 PM
I am sorry, Moxie. Take good care.
Posted by: Jamie | June 12, 2006 at 01:42 PM
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss.
Posted by: Susie | June 12, 2006 at 02:02 PM
Before you had babies, pets were our babies. They are still our children, in a way, even after human children join our family. I'm so sorry for the loss of an innocent soul in your family. Blessings and peace to you all.
Posted by: MamaChristy | June 12, 2006 at 02:13 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss. We had to put our two beloved rabbits to sleep within a few months of each other last year. I stayed with each of them through the sedative but stepped out for the euthanasia shot. Remembering them still brings on tears. Your children, and your kitty, are exceedingly lucky to have you caring for them. Peace to you all through this tough time.
Posted by: shayneegray | June 12, 2006 at 02:20 PM
I'm so sorry.
Posted by: Jody | June 12, 2006 at 02:39 PM
It sounds as if you are handling this as well as anyone ever can, Moxie. I'm so sorry this has to happen, but at least you know you are doing the best thing for both the cat and the rest of the family. : (
Posted by: Alison S | June 12, 2006 at 02:52 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss. There's not much comforting about it now, but I'm firm in my belief that I'll see all of my pets again someday when the time comes! I'm sure the kitty was grateful that you made such a hard decision...
Posted by: Leah | June 12, 2006 at 03:24 PM
Oh Moxie.What a beautiful kid. So sorry.
Posted by: Lisa V | June 12, 2006 at 03:32 PM
Oh Moxie I am so sorry. What a sad, sad loss. Poor Siggy - she is lucky to have a family that loves her and cares for her as much as you all obviously do.
And your son is WONDERFUL.
Posted by: Menita | June 12, 2006 at 03:43 PM