Two more thoughts

Two more thoughts on the "false advertising" thing:

The first from commenter Robin over at I Blame the Patriarchy (warning, don't go there if you aren't OK with being insulted, whoever you are). In comment #40, Robin compares trying to escape the confines of the traditional feminine beauty model as a game of Prisoner's Dilemma. Dude. Both hilarious and thought-provoking. (Thanks for the tip-off on that blog, K.)

The second is the song that's been going around in my head ever since I read the first few posts on this topic:

"Women, not girls, rule my world. I say they rule my world. Act your age, Mama, not your shoe size."

All this brouhaha, and in the end Prince had it all along: Grow up and be happy with who you are. A real man wants a woman who's happy with herself, no matter what she looks like.

Comments

[Amy D.]

here, here; cin-cin; and salute! (I'll drink one for you!) love your stuff, moxie!

[MamaChristy]

Well, Prince is a musical and lyrical genius. No wonder he got it right! :)

[Katie/WannaBeMom]

AMEN to that.

[Rosie]

In my head it's Tom Jones....
think i betta dance now....

R

[boxing octopus]

I don't know if it's already been said here or elsewhere (that's the problem with doing a PhD at the same time you have a baby -- really cuts into the blog-reading time), but this whole false-advertising thing isn't just insulting to women. It's insulting to men to assume that they're so stupid as to think their wives are going to look exactly the same as they did on their wedding day for the rest of their lives. Why flatten the male intellect so grievously?

[kbm]

I don't know about false advertising--it sounds pretty absurb to me but i do seem to feel more pressure than ever to be hip and thin. i don't know if it has to do with being married/just having a baby or if it's society in general.

this article about how looking 20-something is the gold standard for both younger and older women is interesting.

http://www.tvsquad.com/2006/01/26/has-the-oc-gone-too-far/

[Erin]

I loved reading your post (and all the related posts and comments) yesterday. When my husband came home from work, I asked him if he would love me better if I looked like I did at our wedding (we've had 2 kids in 2 years) and he asked me if I was crazy without even batting an eyelash. God bless him. If you are in a relationship with a person, you have to accept them for who they are on the *inside*, not the outside. For better, for worse, for love handles, for receding hairlines...

And, you managed to get Prince to agree with you. And anyone who can do that, well... I'm loving it. Thanks, Moxie!

[Brooke]

I found it interesting (but mostly as a side note) that Twisty made the connection between not being immediately in love with your infant and the way that infant looks.

[Her Bad Mother]

You're exactly right; I was prompted by my confused reactions to the debate to work it all out in a post at my own blog, and that was the most important conclusion (most important to me) that I came to. Love yourself, however you are, and the love comes back.

But loving a new self can be a real struggle,and it's never just a struggle over weight. Motherhood makes us new people; acknowledging that that can be tough is, I think, critical to really being able to embrace *all* that new motherhood brings.

[Christine]

Here's what I keep going back to - here's why I can't let this drop yet :

What message are we sending to our daughters?

[Lisa V]

I quote that line to my oldest two daughters all the time.

As I said in my post change should not only be expected, but celebrated. We're grown-ups we can handle the changes.

[Rose]

Amen.

[FishFace]

Keeping with the lyric theme, I kept hearing the Trailer Trash Troubadors "Skinny women ain't hip" running through my head when I read your original post.

"If you're skinny as a rail
and you think you're hot
you might be making the most
of everything that you got
I don't mean to be ruthless
I don't mean to be rude
but give me a call
when you're on solid food"

[littlem]

Haven't weighed (whoops) in on this because, although a "Hollywood fat" girl (size 12, lift weights, deal) and an NYC attorney, where skinny is paramount for women, I'm not a mom.

That said,

"think i betta dance now...."

Whoo!
[air guitar}
na-mi-na-mi-na-mi-na-mi-
na-mi-na-mi-na-mi-na-mi-
dee-dat-dat

At the end of the day, that's REALLY what it's about, isn't it?

I mean, does anyone think they're going to be waiting at the pearly gates with a damn scale?!?

[Deb]

Of course he had it right all along, Prince rocks mama!

[Rohita]

I love Jacob Lawrence and I agree with the notion that he is the most pniroment African American painter in US history. His painting never fail to draw me and touch me on a very deep level.

[Rheta]

Silhouettes are such a fun memory for me besacue when I graduated from the 6th grade from Elementary School, we each hand painted our very own Silhouettes with black paint and then framed them to add to our Memory Wall' which was a part of our graduation theme. I remember us findng a partner to pair up with and having a turn standing in front of the projector and having our silhouette traced. It was so fun and the best part was painting it later. I held on to that for years, but when I moved away from home my Mom just added it to her scrapbook of memories. You know those scrapbooks that are just thin paper, the ones that we wouldn't dare put pictures in today! Lol. Thanks so much for the memory and for the chance to win some amazing stamps. Hugs

[Lerato]

I feel for you Julie, I have a similar image from the past!Love the suttoilhes, They would work great for the missing photos in my family tree. I will have to get the chipboard and rub-ons to play with,ROAD TRIP!

[Arife]

WOW!! Brings back memories!! I love that you still had yours to share!! Those badris are too cute!! I love all of the inspiration pieces too!! THANKS for the chance to win!! Have a FABULOUS WEEK!! =)