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The 10-year-old's reading


  • MoxieTopics
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« Q&A: daily schedule for a 5-month-old | Main | Q&A: 10-week-old taking his first bottle »



I remember my toddler waking up in the night, (although I think he was older than 18 months). I would jump straight up out of bed everytime and run to him afraid he had a bad dream or something. All I would do was hug him and cover him up. Half an hour later, the same thing would happen. Finally, I decided to try something new. The next time he cried, I just stayed in bed (this was hard!!), and guess what?! He just cried for a few minutes and went back to sleep and stayed asleep the rest of the night!! I discovered that this worked 9 times out of 10. There are those occasions, though, when I had to go in. It might be worth a try!

Also, I want to encourage all of you breastfeeding moms to be confident in your decision to breastfeed. Breastmilk is best for any baby! I know there are those times when breastfeeding just does not work, but if you are able to do it, rejoice! You are feeding your baby the way God intended! Breastfeeding gives the baby all the nutrients he/she needs and all of mom's antibodies! Babies are less likely to be overweight with breastmilk and are less likely to have ear infections. I am not going to say that breastfeeding is always convenient, but it is definitely the best!


I confess, the experiences both of you relate terrify me. Moxie, you were kind enough to answer one of my sleep questions when I wrote in several months ago, back when my daughter was 10 months old. Well, she's 15 months now, and her sleeping hasn't improved much. She's still waking every one to two hours throughout the night and can only be put to sleep by me. Sometimes she will let my husband hold her--he just can't put her down if she drifts off in his arms. She'll stay asleep for slightly longer stretches when she's sleeping with us, but I have yet to get more than 3.5 hours at a stretch from her. That's a lengthy leadup to saying that I'm terrified of 18 months, when I anticipate we'll revert to waking every 45 minutes or so. At least I'm aware of impending doom and thus slightly prepared. But let me tell you, it will be extremely difficult to ever produce a sibling at this rate--particularly since getting the mythical 6 hours of sleep sounds a lot more appealing than hot after-hours gymnastics most days!


I am so with Shayneegray, it's not even funny. Or I would laugh, if I were getting more sleep.

Madam has never been a good sleeper, still isn't a good sleeper, and perhaps will NEVER be.

Of course, I blame myself for nursing her to sleep, rocking, and not doing CIO, but...well, honestly? I don't have the ENERGY to try any big sleepy changes now.

The thought that things will still suck this hard at 18 months (she's 9 months now) is honestly making me want to jump out of a moving car.


Shayneegray, your daughter might be one of the ones that start sleeping through at 18 months. Apparently that happens to, sometimes, with kids who haven't slept through before.

Monica, 9 months is a long way from 18 months. My older one started sleeping through at around 14-15 months, stopped at 18, started again at 20, and never looked back. Occasionally he'll wake up from a nightmare or something (and when he wet the bed when he was first potty-trained and when #2 arrived) but for the most part once he's out he's out until at least 6. I think that's pretty common.


Moxie, that hope will beckon to me like the image of a rare and elusive orchid (one mangled simile with hints of Adaptation, coming up).

Monica, from one struggling in the trenches of sleep deprivation to another, I offer this potential ray of hope: Obviously our girls are different people, but I will say that the sleep, or lack thereof, sucked the worst for us at 9 to 10 months. Gaining significant mobility around the 9-month mark meant N was waking up every 45 minutes, and waking up angry because she was trying to move in her sleep. We're still not sleeping well by most people's standards, waking 4 to 6 times a night, but it's certainly better than it was. The problem is, being this tired all the time, I can't truly appreciate the improvement for what it is. And, frankly, I likely won't feel like we are sleeping well until she's almost sleeping through (say, waking once while we're still up and once later at night). So things may improve for you in the upcoming months. (We actually thought we'd turned the corner for good around 12 to 13 months, when she had 10 days of only waking 2 to 3 times a night...then came her 1-year checkup and vaccinations. Damn!)

Good luck to all parents battling for just a bit more sleep.


My older daughter (now almost 3) had two major sleep regressions. The first was at 9 months and the second was at 16 1/2 months. I handled both with something called the Sleep Lady Shuffle. There were some tears, but it was something I considered humane and doable. Kim West is the author of the book, and although some of her info on breastfeeding isn't the most accurate, I think her method is pretty damn good, not to mention a happy medium between No-Cry and Ferber/Mindell.

Best of luck to all of you. I am currently nursing a 6-month old 2-4 times a night, so I know well the feeling of being so tired that it's probably a hazard to drive!!


just to chime in on the sleep regression topic...my 19 month old, who has been a perfect sleeping angel his whole short life, just started waking up over the last four nights about an hour after I put him down. He screams and wails "mommy" "up" "mommy" over and over. I try to wait it out 10-15 sometimes even 20 minutes but he doesn't cease. It's heartbreaking to think he's afraid, alone, had a nightmare, sick etc. and I'm not doing anything. I've tried to just stay in his room, rub his back but he won't have it. He wants to be in my arms, in my bed or rocked in the chair. I'm on night five right now, he's only been asleep for half an hour... obviusly I'm still grappling with how to handle this.


I am having the same trouble with my soon-to-be 18 month old and sleep. It has been blowing my mind! The first 9 months were bad, but we were nursing and I dealt with it, then like a dream he started to go to bed peacefully and sleep all night...no problem. Then starting last Friday he just began fighting bedtime and waking up in the middle of the night crying. I am at my wits end because I don't see an end in sight, except to take him to bed with me which I don't want to do. It is reasuring to hear this may be normal and he could go back to being a good sleeper soon. I hope so. I hate to let him cry, but often that is what I resort to doing because I simply can not stand being there while he is crying and just needs to sleep. So frustrating!

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  • My expertise is in helping people be who they want to be, with a specialty in how being a parent fits into everything else. I like people. I like parents. I think you're doing a fantastic job. The nitty-gritty of what you do with your kids is up to you, although I'm happy to post questions here to get data points of how you could try approaching different stages, because, let's face it, this shit is hard. As for me, I have two kids who sleep through the night and can tie their own shoes. I've been a married SAHM, a married freelance WAHM, a divorcing WOHM, a divorced WOHM, and now a WAHM again. I'm not buying the Mommy Wars and I'll come sit next to you no matter how you're feeding your kid. When in doubt, follow the money trail. And don't believe the hype.
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