I'd love to post more, but this whole thing has just cracked open a huge mass of seething anger and rage about a lot of things that I think would be too frightening for people. So if you want to know how I'm feeling right now, just Google '"blue october" lyrics' and pretty much whatever comes up will be pretty accurate.
One of my best heart-friends and I haven't talked in almost half a year, and we got back in touch this morning (he's on a different continent right now), and he's found the love of his life and is engaged! I could not be more thrilled for him, as I knew he wasn't sure he'd ever find her, but he's just got so much love inside him and will make a wonderful husband.
I reacted to the news by bursting into happy tears, thinking "Thank God it actually works for some people," and realizing that my passport has been expired for a long time. So I finally went and got a passport photo taken (hilariously awful!) and then was thwarted by the whole renew-by-mail system because my last passport expired so long ago. I applied for that one the day the Rodney King verdict was announced, so yeah, a long time ago. Now I'm going to have to go stand in line for this thing. Which is why I've delayed so long anyway.
Dwelling on these petty annoyances is good.